Monday, April 18

I had chemo again on Friday and had a pretty rough weekend. I did, however, make it to church on Palm Sunday (love waving those palms!). Church was so good--great music, great message by Paster Randy, part of which was about how pragmatism doesn't work. Thought-provoking..I like it when he makes us think. And I especially like the way he never fails to lift up God's Word as the ultimate Truth. (It's the main thing--and, as someone said, "the main thing is keeping the main thing the main thing"!)

Decided to stay home today and rest. Ken drove me to Fargo and back for radiation treatment. Tomorrow I will feel better and will stay in Fargo Tues-Wed-Thurs, God-willing. Then chemo on Friday (my 4th of 6). I am thinking of trying acupuncture this week. A friend told me she has it after chemo and it seems to help her feel better. I guess it doesn't hurt to try it once. I am asking the Lord to grant me some extra energy this weekend, since I received the terrific news that all my kids and their families are coming for Easter weekend! Can't wait! And even more, they are bringing all the food. Ken said if I don't feel well, I can just lay in my bed and hold court : )  (not that I'm the queen or anything).

I haven't been eating very well, but just had part of a Paula's roast beef dinner plate. If you haven't eaten at Paula's restaurant in Mayville, you're in for a treat if you ever get the chance. Although nothing has appealed to me lately, the roast beef and mashed potatoes were really good.

I wish I were stronger, but this is a time I need to trust God more than ever. And I need to embrace this time where I am forced to slow down and to depend on God and others and not so much on myself. It is true that we grow so accustomed to being self-sufficient that it is a difficult thing to become very dependent on God to take us through a difficult time. I think (and surely it's true) the whole self-sufficiency thing is really just an illusion, anyway, but it's a powerful one. Maybe this is God's way of getting me to realize that I'm not as strong as I think I am and to acknowledge I am not my own person, but it is "in Him I live and move and have my being" (Acts 17:28).

May it be to me as it was for Paul:

2 Corinthians 12:9: But he [God] said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me."


I keep receiving cards and good wishes, and I know so many are praying for me. What a blessing!

May you have a blessed Easter week!